by Cynthia Bischoff | Nov 2, 2013 | Heartliving
The world abounds with symbols. Some are universal and others unique to certain cultures. Symbols are profound expressions of our intellect, emotions, and spirit. A symbol can represent deep intuitive wisdom that eludes direct expression, and symbols can be found in our dreams certainly, but also in our waking state. It is helpful to observe the symbols in your life in your waking day, allowing the universe to speak to you through its symbolic language.
Throughout the centuries, symbols in their infinite forms have enriched people’s lives. Cultures in all parts of the world have built upon a universal understanding of symbols to better understand well-being of mind, body, and spirit. Often in deep spiritual work, we are asked to identify and focus on symbols that appear in our dreams and in our waking lives. These symbols may, for example, appear in our drawings and over time become highly personalized, take on deeper levels of meaning, and come to help us express aspects of the psyche that may be difficult to put into words.
We find symbols in our daily life and in our dreams. Here are some common examples defined:
Did you know?
THE RIVER
Seen as a life-source, rivers carry potent meanings. They can represent the boundaries between life and death. In Hindu belief, rivers symbolize purification.
ICE AND SNOW
Ice symbolizes coldness, rigidity, and stillness, both in humans and in nature. Therefore, snow as a form of “softer” ice often expresses the return of life. Snow can stand for truth and individuality.
MOUNTAIN
The meeting place of heaven and earth, the mountain symbolizes eternity and our ascent on our life’s journey.
FIRE
Symbolizing passion and energy, fire can represent deep emotion, such as love, or alchemical transformation.
TREE
Wholeness, harmony, and family are reflected in the tree image.
CAVE
When a cave is found in a dream state, it may mean that this is a time of initiation, truth, wisdom, or readiness for going deeper.
DOORWAY or WINDOW
Is the door or window open or closed? Doorways and windows symbolize opportunity, opening, luck, and progress. Have you heard the phrase–“a window of opportunity” or “the door to success”?
Pay attention to the symbols that occur in your dream state and also in your daily life. Record patterns, spend some time journaling, and meditate on their significance as messengers in your life right now!
by Cynthia Bischoff | Oct 26, 2013 | Heartliving
Self-esteem can be seen as the combination of how you perceive yourself and the value you place on the self you see.
You have core self-esteem which is the value you place on yourself at your core, and situational self-esteem which is the value you place on yourself determined by situational factors (work situation at the moment, weight at the moment).
Certain researchers say that core self-esteem is in place by age 4 and is determined by how your caregivers responded to you. No matter what, it is exciting to know that your core self-esteem can be improved. How?
- If you suffer from any thoughts of being a victim, expand your awareness so that you are able to decide that victim consciousness or self-blame is simply toxic now. Let it go.
- Make a nonjudgmental inventory of your talents and strengths and set goals for accepting them and continuing to improve yourself.
- Stop neglecting your own needs to take care of others. Be compassionate and loving, but not disrespecting of yourself.
- Do your very best at any given moment (it will vary depending upon what your circumstances are).
- Remember that positive self-esteem is not created by “all or none” thinking. Allow yourself to risk-take and realize that even seeming “mistakes” can help you grow!
- Let go of the cultural standards of beauty and FEEL your beauty from WITHIN. Offer that as a gift to yourself and everyone around you. People are drawn to others who feel good about themselves.
- Learn to speak about yourself with directness and honesty. Express your integrity through the harmony of what you say and do.
Above all, celebrate your risk-taking and your successes!
by Cynthia Bischoff | Oct 19, 2013 | Heartliving
Many books are written about relationships–how to attract the right partner, how to keep your partner, how to communicate with your partner, why your partner is not that into you, and so on! The truth is that relationships can be complex and do require some attention if two people are to grow together into more intimate union and love.
Most often, instead of understanding relationship dynamics, people think that if they can just change this or that about their partners, their relationships would finally work. Does this sound familiar? We must know that no one is perfect nor to be blamed and following some common-sense guidelines can help you to improve your relationship. They are based on effective principles of communication and should be practiced by both partners:
- For starters, don’t expect your partner to satisfy all of your relationship needs. Take good care of yourself. Maintain healthy friendships outside of your primary relationship, and you will be less apt to feel that you need your partner to “complete” you.
- Be sure to maintain a friendship as well as a love relationship with your partner. Most couples who stay together do so because of a sense of friendship and respect that exists long after the romantic sparks might not be as bright. Partners who are friends generally like and accept each other as they genuinely are.
- It’s important to practice active listening. Sometimes all your partner wants you to do is just listen. So listen carefully; then paraphrase back to your partner what you believe you heard him or her say. It greatly helps to keep all communication clear.
- Know that talking over each other or not acknowledging what we’ve heard causes monologues rather than dialogues. And when you do listen and especially when you pick up what matters to your partner, you can ask about it at another time, making your partner know you did listen and that you care.
- Know what you do want and communicate that clearly. We sometimes get stuck in repeating what we don’t want or like and don’t communicate clearly what we do want. Instead of “it bothers me when you say that” try “I appreciate that you shared that with me in that way.”
- Avoid arguments as a way of getting attention or engaging in drama. Find a more productive way to be in relationship and avoid taking your frustrations out on your partner. If your partner is doing that with you, have a conversation about how you feel–in a constructive way.
- If you must disagree, do what is termed “fight fairly.” The language we use during a conflict has a critical effect on our relationships. Calling each other names and blaming each other will dissolve trust and respect faster than anything else. And if this has already happened, you can commit to starting over now. Remember “up until now”!
- Commit to change. Know that a healthy relationship is one that continues to evolve. Establish regular conversations with your partner to be sure important issues are being addressed and understood.
- Most of all, soften your heart. Sometimes, you have to rise above the current situation and look at the overall picture of your relationship. How long have you been together? What have you been through? In what ways have you shared your lives and supported one another? What might you do differently now? Of all the tips, perhaps this is most important of all!
You can also set aside one “date” each week with your partner in which you don’t talk about the children (if there are kids), you don’t talk about work or about money, the house, etc., but you talk about each other. I have suggested this to clients who have done this. I remember a client telling me that she and her husband looked at each other and had nothing to say at first on that “first date.” The good news is that they stayed committed, though, to that date each week. By the second week, they started talking about what mattered to them, sharing some of their hopes and dreams as well as fears. –Or as she put it, “getting down to some deep inner stuff.” Over time, it greatly improved their connection.
All in all, we came into this world to learn to love and to know that we are love. Nothing is perhaps more powerful than heart connections.
by Cynthia Bischoff | Oct 12, 2013 | Heartliving
Throughout life, we encounter relationship challenges. Perhaps we feel hurt by someone. When these moments arise, we may indeed feel a wound from the experience that unfortunately can continue long after the hurtful event has occurred. If that has happened, you may continue to feel the wound as long as you relate to the person as an “enemy” or you continue to remember the hurtful situation. Unfortunately, if you get caught in a psychological complex, you may even wear the hurt like a negative “badge of honor”!
Worse yet, if you keep the person in that role of enemy, even if you are not doing it consciously, you may continue to play out the role of victim and hold the other person to be perpetrator. The only way to change the relationship is to change the way you think about and relate to this person. How?
Ask yourself: Is it possible for me to remember a time when this person was kind or showed love and compassion toward me or even toward someone else? One client told me that she simply thinks of the person as having been at some point a small, vulnerable child, and this allows her to have more compassion for the person.
If you can focus your thoughts on the person from a positive view, you may be able to find some goodness within him or her. Your kinder thoughts do not change that the past happened, but your new outlook can free you of the negative connection that you might be holding. By investing in more positive thoughts, you will gain more positive “dividends.”
Keep in mind above all that no one is perfect—-not you—-nor this person. Remember that no one is all good or all bad.
If you are able to send out positive energy to this person—-whether in their presence or from a distance—-you can allow them to meet healthier expectations that you hold about them. As you free yourself from negative feelings, you will raise your vibration as well as your expectations. You will also free the other person as well as yourself from negative bondage.
You will manifest what you expect, including how you hold other people to be.
So expect good people and good things to come to you!
by Cynthia Bischoff | Oct 5, 2013 | Heartliving
People often ask me how they can become a (fill in blank—teacher, healer, coach, artist, etc.), something they’ve perhaps always desired.
Whatever it is you desire to do, begin doing it now. Don’t keep thinking about HOW to make it happen logically. Your focused energy will propel it.
In fact, LOGIC is DEATH to the miracle maker in you! So it’s best to stop trying to make it happen through logic.
So, for example, if you want to teach,
- Look into every way in which you can teach now officially or unofficially (lend a hand, explain how someone can improve a process, etc.)
- Then RESEARCH all the options that are out there for teaching as a career—how to become a certified teacher (e.g., Teacher Switcher program at ODU), but also ways to volunteer your time to teach and help.
- What I have found is that if you HOLD YOUR INTENTION CLEARLY and remain true to your desire, the Universe will assist you in manifesting your intent.
- Create a focused mission statement and repeat it. For 10 years, I repeated the mantra: “I desire to teach and help others internationally.”
- I never once thought that this would be NOT be possible, although I didn’t understand HOW it could happen. I didn’t get caught up in the logic of it–the “how’s.”
- About seven years ago, I was asked out-of-the-blue to assist a person in going to Japan and giving a lecture on healing (my work in U.S.). I paid money to go to Japan, lost income while there the first time, but KNEW I needed to do this because it FELT right.
- I knew in my heart this was an opportunity that matched my intention, so I TRUSTED.
- I will be going to Japan again in November to teach, counsel, and perform healing sessions—over 13 visits later!
- The bottom line is that you have to BELIEVE.
- Higher Powers will assist you if you hold a noble intention. If you make that intention involve HELPING OTHERS, the Universe will become your loving partner. Of that I am clear.” –Cynthia Bischoff
NOTE: This picture was taken a few years ago on a visit to Japan. Yes, there I am in my kimono with a beautiful garden behind me. I was fortunate to participate in a tea ceremony. I am so grateful to my Japanese friends!
