Your growth in life requires what I call “an archeological dig into yourself” to gain understanding. In other words, it’s helpful to go back and look at old beliefs, how you got them, and whether or not they are helping you now.
I believe that often we suffer because we have roamed so far from our true core that we don’t know who we are. We haven’t looked into our own vulnerable hearts in so long, we wouldn’t recognize ourselves if we did.
We may run from this inner awareness because we feel that if we actually gave attention to it, we would be overwhelmed. Our perceptions of what is and isn’t are what make our life feel either good or bad, either sacred or monstrous. These perceptions create our point of view about who we are, about who other people are, and about life itself.
We engage in our life dramas every day. Each of us is starring in our own play called “Life” and we are partnered with other cast members to share life’s lessons. We’re all on each other’s stages together.
Our issues, our fears, and our vulnerabilities cause us to protect our real needs and I believe even to negotiate away our power. Yet at our deepest level, we want to be ourselves, say what we feel, be who we are (not with intent to harm another but simply to be true to ourselves), yet we sometimes respond by denying our feelings because we are afraid our partner will leave us. Or we may do work that we don’t like or that doesn’t inspire us because it keeps us feeling safe and secure. We decide how we think the world is and we create a list of judgments about ourselves and others.
And the truth is that we are really all looking for the same thing—which is to be loved and valued.
If you want to change and improve your life, you have to apply a gentle curiosity to what is going on in your own vulnerable heart. A wonderful exercise is to ponder the following questions:
- Who lives there in your heart?
- What does your heart wish to tell you about your life right now?
- What do you need and desire?
- What are you willing to let go of or bring into your life?
Opening your heart and listening to it improves the balance and health of your body, mind, and spirit. On this Valentine’s Day and heart month, take a moment to listen to and love your own heart.